You’re sitting at home playing some Call of Duty 4 when you get the urge for something to eat. Because you play that XBOX every waking moment you haven’t taken the time to stock the fridge or pantry with something edible which means you’re making a road trip to the local corner food mart to try and silence that food-deprived stomach. You pull up to the store and head inside to see what’s available. While listening to some tunes on your IPOD you try to decide between the 8-hour old hot dog on the grill, some dried-out chicken tenders that have sat under the heating lamp so long they’re as tough as rubber, or a pint of Ben & Jerry’s that has more calories in it than what Roseanne Barr can consume at an all-you-can-eat buffet. You do the right thing and opt for all three. As you head up to the counter to checkout you see somebody else has come in the store and is arguing with the cashier. You must not have heard them come in because of your tunes. You get a better look and the guy has got a knife. Unbelievable. The store is getting held up while you’re inside. A car is honking out side. The getaway driver is getting anxious because it’s taking too long. Feeling the pressure, the robber is becoming agitated because the cashier is having trouble getting the register open. Then he notices you trying to get invisible behind the potato chip rack. Now he’s really starting to wig out. The register drawer slides open. The robber makes a grab for some cash. The cashier gets brave and tries to stop him. You see the flash of a knife. The cashier disappears behind the counter. The door bangs open as the robber makes his getaway. You stand there in stunned silence as your mind replays it all back in slow motion. The screeching of rubber outside jolts you back to reality. You rush up to the counter to check on the cashier expecting the worse. To your amazement he’s pulling himself up off the floor. Shocked, you tell him you saw him get slashed with the knife. The cashier says, “Yeah, but luckily I had my new slash resistant t-shirt on.” You’re like, “Your what?”









